My eyes are heavy. My head feels like it’s full of sand and I have turned into a wibbly wobbling slurring mess with panda bear-esque dark circles under my eyes! Yes I am crashing. My energy levels have hit the floor and I am at my desk at work with a fatigue so crushing that even sitting feels overwhelming.
I stare at the computer screen and try to figure out what I’m supposed to be doing, and which buttons I need to be pressing and all the while I feel I could slither off my chair and onto the oddly coloured carpet of my office floor.
The above scenario represents a typical day for me now. I started in my current job just over a year ago, but for the past 6 months or so my health has continued to go downhill.
Everyday is such a battle now. I have a wannabe Type A personality in a body that wants to rest all day. I have so many ideas, so many plans that I want to get so excited about and throw myself into but I just can’t. I have to reign myself in, to give what little energy I have to the job I have to do, and it does basically get all my energy.
When I get home from work I am counting the minutes before I can go to bed. I make the quickest dinner possible and do any other bits that I have to so I can be ready for the next working day. After that I’m pretty much done and most days I’m in bed by half 8.
I’ve found very little to help the fatigue. Drinking more coffee, drinking less coffee, sleeping more, sleeping less, eating small regular meals, giving up snacking between meals, removing certain foods from my diet, taking various supplements, taking painkillers, drinking herbal teas, going for walks, drinking more water, switching between tasks, listening to different types of music – nothing helps!
But I do keep the hope that one day soon I might wake up with some energy! The loveliness of that thought helps to keep me going! I will not give up! 😊